In my backyard

When I think of hatred and violence, I tend to think of something far away... you know, it's in that country or in that part of the city... The people near me are good people, right? On Friday morning, I was witness to a very confronting incident on the bus really challenge my underlying attitude of "not in my backyard". I was catching the bus on the way to uni, when a youngish man boarded with a radio blaring from his backpack [This is actually illegal on public transport here; music is supposed to audible only to the person listening to it - i.e. used with headphones]. One of the other passengers requested that he turn it down, and was met with a barrage of insults, swearing and threats of violence, even after the bus driver's warning, that I was scared for the safety of the man who complained and for the other passengers around. It was such a small thing, and it unleashed such a lot of hate. Being me, I wrote a poem about it...

Bus is quiet
People silent
New passenger disturbs our rest
Loud music blares
Everyone stares
Til someone decides to protest
He swears and shouts
About to strike out
Bus driver issues a warning
Hearing death threats
What will come next?
Will there be blood spilt this morning?
I want to hide
Crying inside
Wishing it were all just a jest
There's so much hate
Love seems too late
For this morning bus ride in the West.

A Poetic Turn

This started off as something entirely different... it was originally a poem of thanks to a friend, but somehow became something else entirely. I'm not sure about a couple of the lines... but I needed to 'publish' it or I will keep using up time when I should be doing assignments tweaking it.


"Of Grace"

Out of the darkness you heard my cries
Fought a path through the forest of lies
Called me beloved and opened my eyes
To grace

You whispered of a Way and a Light
To lead my heart from its starless night
Having tasted it, my soul will fight
For grace

Unashamedly my soul now sings
For God has given this fledgling wings
My spirit soars free as each dawn brings
His grace

KJGH, May 2009

Chasing Sunsets

I catch the train home from uni most nights - around a 30-35 minute ride - in the late afternoon, which at the moment (as we're approaching winter here in the Southern Hemisphere) is around the time the sun is setting, and my train travels directly west, following the disappearing sun.

I was sitting on the train a couple of days ago, when I happened to look up from my book and realize that out the window behind me was an incredibly amazing sunset -an incredible red-orange sun illuminating pink clouds and sending off those visible beams of sparkly golden light. It was beautiful and the sight of it lifted away all the clouds of emotional worry that had been ruling my day up until then.

I turned back from the window to see if anyone else in the carriage had caught the same taste of glorious joy from the image of it that I had, but no. They all still had their heads buried in books, magazines, the newspaper, the PSP, the iPod. And I really thought at that moment... this is what our society is. We're so busy chasing after happiness from anywhere that promises it, that we miss the simple moments of true joy, in merely being a witness to God's magnificent creation.

Bearing Witness

I often hear people toss around the idea that we don't need to go out and evangelise, because we are supposed to be witnesses in the way we live our lives. Now, I don't know about you, but I don't really think the beauty and glory of the gospel shines through the way I live my life, and I know in some instances my life is more likely to drive people away....

I saw this happen today at work, and it made me so sad....

A customer came in, wanting an item in an unusual quantity, which we were unable to produce. We apologised and offered her some alternative options, to which her response was "You people are hopeless. Why can't you just give me what I asked for? Every other place has managed to." The assistant serving her, myself and the pharmacist were a little taken aback at the rudeness.

Then the woman continues to talk at the assistant as she fixes up her purchases, and the customer says "When I was at church this morning..." After the customer had left, the pharmacist turns to the other assistant and myself and says "Wonderful Christian spirit there, eh?"

Paul says we are Christ's ambassadors to the world. We are sent with the message of the gospel, representing God. But does our behaviour, particularly to those who are serving us, reflect the true spirit of Christ? Are we holding up the reputation of Christ or bringing it into disrepute? Just some food for thought, that made me think about my own behaviour and speech.

Don't Want To...

WASTE MY LIFE.

I've just finished reading John Piper's book "Don't Waste Your Life", and it has been echoing a lot of the things I have been learning from other areas - my own Bible reading, church and even some conversations with friends.

I don't have a specific path that I know I am being called to as yet. But I think one of the things God has been telling me over and over at this stage of my life and education is not to get fixed on one job or area as 'the one'. Be open to being used by him in ways that will surprise even you. Because ultimately, it isn't so much what you do that matters - it's why you are doing it and who you are serving by it. And though it seems hard to grasp, I am going to have infinitely more joy if I invest my life in serving God and serving others, than in following anything for me-centric reasons.

Wherever I go, whatever I do, all I know is I want to be reflecting Christ, being content in Christ, bringing glory to Christ and loving Christ above all else. That will not be a wasted life.